10 Manly Lessons from Male Solo Traveling
Solo traveling as a female and male are the same right? This would be a foolish assumption because everyone’s solo travel experience is unique to them regardless of gender. But there are some commonalities due to gender. I have read countless blogs of inspiring female solo travelers. They all had their unique experiences as people but as females, they had some common experiences. This is what makes a community, sharing your experience with others who can relate. After five years of traveling, I now understand that men do indeed have a different travel experience than women. This revolves around the needs and personal lessons of the individual. You may or may not experience some of things, but here are my ten manly lessons from male solo traveling.
What is masculinity
You will have your masculinity questioned if you don’t fit the representations the media gives us. You are supposed to look like Brad Pitt or Denzel Washington, be filthy rich, have a beautiful wife, and your kids should be going to Harvard. Anything less is considered unsuccessful. If you are traveling solo for long periods of time then you obviously don’t fit this description and you are probably are going to be criticized from your peers for not following tradition of raising a family after college. Congratulations, you decided not to care what others think.
Bruising of the ego
You can be the skinniest and non threatening man ever. If you are traveling alone, other male custom officers will have a penis measuring contest with you. They will try to intimidate, embarrass, or patronize you while you go through the customs process. Testosterone fueled behavior will affect you if you while male solo traveling. Once this is evident, your manhood will be tested. Remember, stay calm and collected.
Your a big scary man
Thanks to other predatorial men, you may be treated as such from other women. Asking the simplest things such as directions can be socially painful because of this stereotype. This usually depends on what country or city you are in. It gets worse, if you attempt to do this and are unable to speak the native language, you look crazy. Before entering another country, it would be wise to learn the basics of the native language.
Lower your expectactions
If you are wise enough to connect with other women and not just other fellow American travelers, your requirements for physical attraction go out the window. You realize the women you were attracted to was coming from a shallow place. Being far far away from what you are used to will make you feel vulnerably naked like a newborn baby. This removes your shallow mind set. Welcome to another humbling moment of male solo traveling.
Age like fine wine
Attempting to through Saki Bombs back like water leaves you feeling like a California raisin the next day. This is followed by an unproductive day from trying to recover physically. This is the moment you realize your not 21 years old anymore. Not only do you realize your body has aged, but you have matured because you rejected women’s offer for sex because you prefer substance. Male solo traveling has it’s unique challenges. Take care of yourself to prolong your travels.
The lonely boy
Loneliness will eventually to start to kick in. You will start to yearn for human connection. Depression sets in because you start to feel vulnerable because as a man, you are taught to be tough. The realization that nobody is around to notice how you feel allows you to cry like a baby. It becomes therapeutic to release your emotions, something that might feel foreign.
Introvert to extrovert
If you find yourself with instant charisma, the loneliness has driven you crazy. You are forced to make new friends with people who are completely different from you. You walk into local bars and become the friendly American if you are in another country. This is especially true if you fumble through conversations because you don’t speak the native language. Trust me, you will find a way to communicate and your social skills will improve.
Know your limits
Depending on where your at, you will eventually crumble to your vices. It’s true what they say, idle hands are the devil’s playground. Gamblers should avoid Las Vegas, recovering drug addicts should avoid some scenes in Los Angeles, recovering alcoholics should avoid any city or country with easy access to booze, and places like Brazil, Ethiopia, and the Dominican Republic have an abundance of women who are looking to use their exotic looks to seduce an American men for the personal agendas.
Ditch the weights
You will realize all of your meat head weightlifting was pointless. If you grew up in a cold climate then it is understandable. You are used to exercising in a gym. As you travel you will notice in warmer climates, there are men who are ripped and lean jumping around the air like Tarzan. Parkour, street workouts, and street dancing is a great way to stay in shape without the gym.
That’s not healthy food?
What you thought was healthy will be challenged. Some countries don’t have an obese soul living there. Eating like a “real man” may be what’s causing you to pack on the pounds around your stomach. You can actually eat small portions and still feel full. There will be an adjustment period due to treating your stomach like a garbage disposal. Have a bag just in case your stomach doesn’t handle food without chemicals well because once you step outside America, you will see how your view of healthy food is challenged.
I feel like these are lessons only a solo male traveler can learn. There are some commonalities that we have with solo female travelers but there are also differences based on needs. It would have taken me a lifetime to learn some of these lessons without travel. I am blessed to be able to travel and fully grasp the concept of solo traveling as a male. I feel it is a privilege and I am humbled to have this opportunity.
- Eric L. Bolden
- E. The Traveling Trainer